A Journey With Table Tennis

Messing Up The Kitchen

2007-01-06T07:03:00.000-08:00

Been messing up my kitchen a lot lately, as I'll have to cook for myself(and possibly my American flatmate) when I'm in NZ. Thought I'd let photos do the talking to show readers what kinda dishes I've been cooking...

Dish 1: Sweet and Sour Steak

Dish 2: Seaweed Tofu

Dish 3: Sharksfin Soup

Dish 4: Broccoli and Cauliflower with Mushrooms

Dish 5: Sausage and Vege Cocktail

I've also baked Molten Choc Cake and Pineapple tarts this few days but have yet to upload the photos. Might 'show off' once again some time soon - if I'm in the mood to. =P

Post-Vietnam Trip

2006-12-26T01:53:00.000-08:00

Came back from Vietnam 3 days ago. In general, it was fulfilling as I managed to achieve my target of winning at least 1 medal. It has been a long time since I participated in an international tournament and the urge to win suddenly returned, as I saw myself training hard for this competition right after the end of my exams. Thank goodness the hard work that I had put in wasn't in pain - Came back with 2 bronzes and I think its good enough, considering how last-minute my preparations for it was.

Fell sick since I came back. First my wisdom tooth(the right one this time) got infected. My gums were so swollen that my cheek got swollen as well. Next it was my throat. The phlegm that I saw was bright yellow! Yuck. =P Went to see a doctor today and was put on antibiotics. Hope it helps. I can't stand having to rest at home the whole day! Also feel bad cos couldn't go NH to coach them today. I counted and realised how many sessions of training I have missed this month. Missed one cos grandma was hospitalized, missed another cos was dizzy after morning training(before the trip), and now I have to miss another. Missed 3 training sessions just within a short span of 1 month. Really hope that I'd be well enough to go tomorrow.

The worst part was being unable to enjoy Xmas as well as I'd wished to. Watched death note 2, had dinner, and felt so terrible that I had to go home after that when it was only about 9pm. Nevertheless, I enjoyed the day as I received a cute present and a box of gingerbread man cookies which my friend baked by himself. Those were things that certainly brightened my day.

Anyway, the Vietnam trip made me realise how bad my stamina was. Was panting like a dog by the 3rd match of the day. My strength and speed had deteriorated very obviously too. =( Think I ought to hit the gym once again and get my body toned before I leave for NZ in less than 2 months' time. Was informed that I'm likely to be sent for the World Uni Games in August next year, so I guess I should start preparing early this time. After all, it's gonna be one of my last few tournaments before I officially start work. I'm beginning to treasure such opportunities more, knowing that these are things that I will no longer get to participate in once I start my career. Also treasure the friendships forged with players of other countries. Felt very sad on my last day in Vietnam, wondering if I would get to see them again. I'm beginning to understand the spirit of such games and appreciate the bonds forged with players of other countries. Its nice to see and feel for myself how people of different countries could come together, play against each other, make an effort to communicate despite the language barrier, and last but not least, enjoy the game and learn from one another!

Oh well, how I wish that I can recover soon... wanna start hitting the gym tomorrow!

Sidetrack

2006-11-08T07:29:00.000-08:00

Perhaps I should talk about something other than TT once in a while in this blog... talking too much about the same stuff may bore my blog and its owner to tears. Also don't want to go ranting about the prospect of the team 'merging' their training sessions with the sec sch next year... as it seems like there is little or even nothing I can do at all. In my HUMBLE OPINION (disclaimer: it is just my personal opinion and you are free to disregard it) *ahem*, '1 of the coaches' there sucks(both coaching skills and personality), full stop. Which is why I really really hope the training won't be combined. I'm sure the new coach which the players are going to have can do a good enough job and won't need any help from his 'counterpart'.

In any case what's going to happen is beyond my control, I reiterate. I can only cross my fingers and sincerely hope that the girls will not be negatively affected by any of such changes. I hope that their actions which are more or less fine now will not be 'any-o-how-changed' and no drastic changes will take place, with the exception of their improvement(i.e. 'drastic' improvements in their skills are certainly welcome). Feeling helpless at the moment. The exchange has already been arranged and it is perhaps a 'once in a lifetime' opportunity which I don't wish to miss. But with such plans come uncertainties. I don't even know the plans after my return too... not sure if they will still want me to coach them. Even if I do, I don't know for how long more I can do so either, for its just a matter of time that I start being bombarded with the duties of a 'cher'. But I know that I certainly will miss the few 'young ones' that I have started training. 1 P1 girl, 1 P3 girl, and 1 P4 girl. Not gonna mention names but it shouldn't be hard to guess who they are at all.

Anyway, on Sunday I came to find out about a coming competition that will be held in the nov/dec school holidays. Felt very excited to see it and immediately informed K's mum about it and asked them to inform the rest of the players too. Really glad that they managed to form a team of 7 people in such a short notice. I'm heartened to see how interested the players are in participating in competitions. It is certainly a good sign. I hope that in this competition, at least a few of them can emerge as medallists in the individual events. Also hope that their team can win a medal.

One moment I said I don't want to talk about TT all the time, and another moment I did it unknowingly. Going senile already, from all that studying. =P Oh yes... I remember now. I wanted to talk about happier things! Gonna participate in a competition this weekend... and its not a TT competition. Guess what? It's a competition to search for the person who can type SMS the fastest. =D Feel quite amused myself that I've actually signed up to take part in such competitions during such a time(with exams nearing), but I think it will be a good break for me from studying. The happiest part being... a friend is going to be there to support me all the way. Since young, I don't remember having any friend/s who would go support me all the way(from the start to the end) in a competition. The most touching part is knowing that this friend will have an appt on the day of the finals that has been arranged weeks ago, but yet he says to me 'If ya get into semi or finals i'll wait. Chance of a lifetime won't want to miss ur moment of glory :) '. My heart melted... it's no longer in the solid state. =P

Don't you think that one of the best things in life is having such supportive and wonderful friend(s) around you? =)

Wisdom Tooth Extraction

2006-10-20T21:04:00.000-07:00

With 5 tests down and just 2 more to go and Deepavali falling on the next day(means no commitment), I finally had the time to get my easily-infected wisdom tooth extracted yesterday. Guess how many days of MC I was given? Not 1, not 2, not 3, not 4, not 5, not 6, not 7, but EIGHT days... All the way up till next Friday. Got freaked out when the dentist's assistant told me I would be getting so many days of MC(before the op) - it only got my imagination running wild before the op, wondering how bad a state I would be in after the op.

I still remember how I woke up in the morning feeling scared, having heard of horror stories from friends about their wisdom tooth extraction experiences. Tried hard not to think too much and tried to have some food, before making my way down to the dentist's. Was feeling extremely nervous(being one that is scared of needles), and the 30 min wait for my turn wasn't helpful at all in alleviating my nervousness.

The next thing I knew, I was in the room... lying helpless on the chair(what do you call that kinda chair?). I turned to ask the dentist in a half-joking manner 'Doctor, when was the last time you performed such an op ah?' He replied 'last week'. I heaved a sigh of relief. Next, the dentist told me that he would be giving me local anaesthesia to numb the area. I asked if there's any other way out other than having injection... to which he replied 'Got, I use hammer to conk you out lor.' DIAO... but he reassured me that it wasn't going to hurt. Surprisingly, he did a good job and I didn't even know when exactly the needle went in, probably because of the cream which he applied to the area before he gave the injection. The next thing I knew, the lower left side of my mouth started getting numb. It surely did feel strange.

Then an X ray of my wisdom tooth was taken and he returned to do all the drilling and cutting. I didn't dare to open my eyes at any point of time, knowing I would surely only be freaked out by all the blood and cutting. I could feel him putting in different kinds of strange stuff into my mouth and at one point of time, using something to pull out the teeth. He was using a lot a lot of force but the tooth refused to come out, being as stubborn as its owner. =P So he did more drilling and cutting(I think), and tried pulling it out with a lot of strength again. I don't know exactly how many times he did it, and finally it came out... though I also didn't know when it came out. After that, I could feel some thread being placed inside my mouth and a knot was tied. After the excess was cut off, the dentist told me 'its done'. RELIEVED is the word to describe how I felt at that moment. The whole dreadful procedure was finally over! I opened my eyes and he showed me the wisdom tooth which he had just extracted, placed it in a small ziploc bag and gave it to me 'as souvenir'. I was surprised to see how big the tooth was, with 2 protruding 'roots' that made it look like a vampire's fangs. Couldn't believe it belonged to me because whenever I checked my teeth in the mirror, I could never see such a big tooth. No wonder it gave me problems - half of that big thing was impacted in my gums and refused to surface, thus causing the frequent infections.

Took a short rest there first before making my way home. He gave me antibiotics and painkiller to be taken three times a day, and this anti-inflammatory medicine that was supposed to be swallowed 12 at the same time. When I swallowed that, I felt as though I was trying to commit suicide. =P

Went back home and took the medication. Had to bite the gauze so didn't manange to eat anything until 6pm in the evening. At that time, the effects of the anaesthetic finally worn off and my mouth didn't feel numb anymore. Unfortunately, that was when it started hurting a hell lot, but thank goodness only for a short while. Was supposed to meet up with a classmate R before he was due to fly off today but ended up having to 'pang seh' him because of the sudden onset of pain. I wasn't sure if that feeling was gonna come back anytime soon.

Thankfully it didn't, and I was feeling quite alright. Even managed to do up some work in the night. However, it seemed that the bleeding hadn't stopped by night. I went to sleep and it wasn't easy getting to sleep because my mouth kept salivating. That wasn't good because it would 'wet' the area and that certainly would not help stop the bleeding. I finally managed to sleep anyway and woke up late this morning, only to spit out a mouthful of blood. I believe I had drank quite a bit of blood throughout the night too, evident from the colour of the phlegm which I spit out. I have officially turned into a blood-sucking vampire. =P

Ended up having to bite gauze again for an hour or so, before having some food then the medication, after which I put another gauze in to bite which is still in my mouth now. Wonder if I will start feeling strange without gauze in my mouth after 2 days of biting it. I BITE hor!

Another weekend burnt... Was already feeling really bored after having so many weekends burnt. Hopefully will be able to have some fun next weekend after the 6th test and 2 weeks before the 7th.

Doubt I will be making full use of the MC given... can't imagine skipping so much lessons just less than 1 month before the exams. =\ In any case, I'm just glad that the semester will be over very soon(last day of exams: 2nd Dec!). After which I will have a long break before heading to NZ somewhere in mid-Feb. I hope that by the time I leave, I have done a good job in training up sufficient players for next year's competition. The motivated ones I mean. I think I may have to give up training a few of them who have lousy attitude and only go training to waste time running and fooling around and save up the time for those really willing to learn and have good attitude.

It will certainly not be easy for the current team to maintain the top 4 position in the nationals, but I hope that at the very least, they could maintain their top 3 position in the zone level. Hope that the players from last year's top 4 team could motivate the current younger players and spur them to reach their level. Some are simply too lazy... that I wonder how many times I have ticked them off for being lazy and for their lousy attitude.

Enough of complaining manz. This whole post consists of nothing but my mindless rantings...

Wishing all Hindus a Happy Deepavali!

Midterm Break

2006-09-23T07:56:00.000-07:00

Half a semester is finally gone! Finally a break from all that horrible lessons... but in return there's tests and more tests to prepare for. Will be having a total of 6 midterm tests this time and I no longer know how to feel about tests/exams. Quite immuned to them already, though I must admit that the stress of studying for them is somewhat still there. While its true that grades are no longer very important to me now and that I no longer study hard just to make papa and mama proud, it is interesting to note how disciplined I have become as compared to the past(say about 3 years ago) when my parents still asked about my grades once in a while. I guess it is really different when we do things for ourselves and we know that we are doing it as part of the process of attaining our personal goals, without the need for anyone to tell us that.

Argh... enough about studies. Talking about those stuff makes me TIRED and I guess just thinking about it might cause a few strands of my hair to turn white. I already know what's in store for me during this short break and I should just stop reminding myself (at least for now) that I need to STUDY. =P

Wonder how the P6 NH girls are getting on in their preparation for the exams. I counted and realised there's only 11 days to it, which is real soon(for people like me not taking the exam). I guess for them, these 11 days will pass by very slowly and torture them like hell, though I hope not. Really do hope that they get some breaks in between and not fall sick due to excessive studying. Hey... It's true that too much studying makes one sick physically and emotionally! Haha~! Who knows, some poor-kid-studying-for-exams-now may quote me and tell their parents what I just said... =x

As usual, gave tuition this morning and went to teach TT in the afternoon. Tuition didn't go on very well, as I was certainly displeased with my student who chose to slack at the wrong time. Gave her the 'cold treatment' and I hope the coldness woke her up a little, to make her realise that her exam is in 11 days' time.

As for the training in the afternoon, it went on well on the whole. There were 2 new P4 players, apparently there to ensure that there will be sufficient(or at least near to sufficient) number of players to play after YL, YR, SY and ZH 's batch graduate. 1 of them is good... at least she has some basic strokes and learnt quite fast. As for the other, I was a little disappointed at the rate at which she was learning... probably because there were quite a few other younger players for me to 'compare her with'.

Its interesting to note the rate at which the players learn. I realised that some of the players learn things very fast and once I point out certain things, they are able to rectify it and at least make a conscious effort to get it right. It certainly feels nice to teach these players as you really witness them picking up the skills. As for some others, no matter how many times you may point out to them that something is wrong, they will still do it wrong again and again. I wonder if thats what many people mean when they talk about 'tian1 fen4'...

In any case, I did think about whether there was a point in spending time to train up the new P4s. Once again, I was making a comparison. What I thought was... might as well spend more time training up the P3s who have more potential and can represent the school for 1 more year. But on the other hand, I guess there was also a need to ensure that there were enough people to represent the school every year for both divisions, without wasting any of the 'resources'(i.e. good players). This sure does remind me of the word 'optimization' and who knows, I may just come up with a linear or nonlinear program to find the optimal solution to this 'problem'. Haha... just in case you think I meant it, com'on, I'm not so free lah. That was really a lame attempt at trying to be funny with Maths... aww. So the conclusion is that there's no way you can get too funny if you're joking about Maths stuff. =P

As for the down side of today's training, someone seemed quite upset after playing a match and I couldn't figure out the reason... just hope that the person is fine now. After all, table tennis is about enjoyment... I think that it's quite sad if studying already is so stressful for them, yet playing table tennis also stresses them out/upsets them. Hope that all of them will try to take things less seriously(when necessary) and have less things in their lives upsetting them! ^_^

Think I should also mention that some of the players have been in pretty good form lately. Its heartening to see that YR's attacks are more powerful(I guess its because she's growing and getting stronger by the day haha) and she managed to give Mr S a hard time just now. In any case, at the rate she's going, I think she will make a very good singles player by next year. Sadly, I can't comment much about YL, SY and ZH now because they didn't attend today's training. Heard that YL and SY fell sick... see, I told you studying is bad for health! ~_^

After training, I went to city area and bumped into SZ there. This country of ours is really small eh???

On the whole, today is a nice day... I'd say it's a good start to my midterm 'BREAK'. *coughs* The thought of studying makes me sick already. Hahz...

Adjusting...

2006-08-23T10:14:00.000-07:00

School has started and I can feel IT coming - the craziness. Who to blame but myself, for choosing to take 5 Maths modules and 1 Physics module(the LAST! :D)... Anyway, there's no time for regrets. It just means I need to be be more focused and faithful in doing my tutorials and keeping up with lessons. My life needs to be adjusted once again, to that of minimizing 'human contact time' during the weekdays. The hermit has once again resurfaced.

After 3 months of not studying, I can feel the inertia there. It doesn't help when some lecturers take a long time to upload their tutorials... When I'm in the mood to do something constructive, there's nothing to be done. When I'm tired and not in the mood for it, it comes. To make things worse, this particular lecturer gave out a piece of paper that says 'tutorial 1' but there are no questions in it. All that's written there is the title of a book that he recommends, and the exercise numbers to be done. A tutorial without questions... how interesting. So I'm(as well as the other 50 odd people taking this module) supposed to go to the library, search high and low for this book, snatch it from whoever's hogging onto it, tear out the pages(or maybe not...), place it on the photocopy machine, insert a cashcard, and press on the print button. Never knew that getting hold of tutorial questions could be such an exciting adventure. Maybe thats how level 4000 modules are made fun! *ponders* Perhaps when I start teaching in the future, I can try that - make my students hunt for their homework questions. I'm sure that will lessen my workload because most likely no one will submit it and I will have nothing to mark. =P (Disclaimer: The above is not to be taken seriously. It does not represent the views of the author.) [This disclaimer is for my future boss to see only hehe]

Other than having to adjust back to studying, I guess I also need to get used to having more and more people around me being miles apart from me. Jer and ZW have left for the States, FY is leaving for UK in a month's time, WJ is leaving for US in 5 hours time and the list goes on... Things are happening too fast for me to feel anything about their leaving at the moment but I'm sure that when all of them have left, I certainly would start to feel IT...

In any case, I'm really happy to be back in Hall after the serious quarrel with my bro some time back. If there's anyone who can get me burning with fiery, its gotta be him... so full stop about him. No point talking about him anyway, he's not gonna read this.

Another adjustment that I foresee I will need to make is having to spend some time during the weekdays for my tuition kid as her PSLE draws near. Hope that it won't be too draining and that I will survive the 'last sprint' together with her.

As for coaching TT at NH, I'm glad to have 2 weeks of break which came at a good time. After that I'll probably be focusing more on brushing up their skills and perhaps teaching some new skills. Lots and lots of multi balls are in for them. I'd think its the best time for skills-upgrading through multi ball training since there is no competition drawing near. Best time to change what needs to be changed too. Some of them have serious problems with their footwork...

As for my own playing, I'm pleasantly surprised that I still managed to beat my counterparts at the recent selection trial for the upcoming Asean University Games(in Dec) despite having not trained for a long time... BUT that might mean extra commitment for myself during the term should they decide that training should start soon. Hope that that doesn't happen otherwise my books would start crying for my attention.

Lastly, think I really need to get used to waking up early once again even though I do not have any lessons in the morning. This semester's timetable is quite horrible, with all my lessons in the afternoon and ending late/very late. Alas, I'm sick of waking up late, skipping breakfast, feeling guilty about having wasted the beautiful morning sleeping away, yet waking up late again the next day. It's about time to do something about it lest it becomes habitual.

Zzz...

A Good Choice, A Silent Hope

2006-07-13T07:16:00.000-07:00

My school attachment programme started this Monday. The purpose of the programme is to give us a glimpse of how the various policies are implemented in schools, observe how teaching is conducted in schools as well as get some hands-on teaching experience. Also, we are all given a project to do and the principal convinced us that our project was important to them because they really needed some ideas on how to deal with a particular group(or should I say class) of students.

I was posted to a school in TPY together with 3 others. It is not the kind of school that produces top scorers in the GCE exams but still, I must say that it is a great school with a compassionate, understanding and realistic discipline master, quite a number of caring teachers and fantastic students. Not in academia but in many other aspects. A number of them have already experienced many of the various 'sufferings' of life and even though many teachers say lots of unpleasant things about them, I strongly INSIST they are not 'bad' after observing them in the past few days.

On the very first day(Monday), the four of us who were posted there spent the whole day with the principal and the vice principal of the school. They gave us a lot of information about the school and shared with us the students' background. The information were mainly statistical and were presented in pie charts and graphs but they certainly were useful in helping us to have an idea of the students that we would be seeing. For example, we were told that majority of the students speak their Mother Tongue at home and not many speak
English at home so from here, we can roughly infer that most of them are not proficient in English and may not understand English that is 'too proper'.

Next, we were given an overview of the programmes that they have in place in the school, including their CCA programme which I feel really needs improvement. Other than that, I was impressed by the programmes that they have in place for the students' welfare. They appeared to be a school that cared a lot about the students who have lots of 'emotional baggage' and students whose families are not earning enough to make ends meet. That sure made me feel heartened for I had always believed no student should be left out in the 'rat race'. In short, it seemed that the school was making a serious attempt to ensure that no student is 'left to die on his own'. At least that was the impression which the Principal and the Vice Principal gave me.

In the midst of the briefing, I was already considering going back to the school when the time comes because I could identify with the school's values, mission and vision. The only disappointing thing is that they did not have table tennis and had very few(only about 4) 'sports and games' CCA. To make matters worse, I bumped into this girl playing table tennis with her PE teacher at the table tennis table in the canteen that day when I was eating and the girl was actually good! I saw that she had the basic strokes and was one with good potential. Being unable to restrain myself, I walked over to them and asked her where she was from. I then found out that she was previously from PCPS which is also my alma mater. She enjoys playing table tennis and feels disappointed that the school does not have table tennis as a CCA. She also mentioned that there were a few others in her shoes. I felt quite sad to hear that... its really such a waste! If only the school had it as a CCA and gave students like her some support, I'm sure they can get into top 4 in the Zone competition at the very least because that zone does not have that many schools that are good in table tennis. Well, perhaps I *might* be given a chance to do something for such students in the not-too-distant future...

The rest of the day was spent meeting the HODs and being introduced to them because the HODs are supposed to 'mentor' us during our attachment period. We were then briefed about the project that the school has assigned to us. Basically we had to find out more about a sec 1 NT class students. According to the school principal and teachers, this class of students is very different as compared to the previous batches of NT students, for their behaviour was much more 'atrocious' and their result was not as good. We are supposed to
interview the students and the teachers teaching that class to get information about them and try to find ways that will help them to learn better. We are also required to observe each subject teacher teach for 2 days(Tue and Wed), after which it would be our turn to teach the class.

Thus, I spent the past 2 days observing the lessons. One pattern which I observed - in certain lessons, the students were better behaved during class and would pay more attention. In some other lessons, the students would behave terribly, talk loudly in class, run around the class during lesson, throw things around, 'fight', etc... almost everything that you can think of in your wildest imagination, you will see it happening there. As a result, during these lessons, it is almost impossible for lessons to be conducted because the teachers spend most of the time scolding students. However, in the lessons which the students were better behaved, the lessons could be carried out(with hitches here and there) and the students were able to learn something from the lessons. They will also do work that is given to them, though their ability vary greatly. There are students who can finish the worksheet given to them in less than 5 minutes while others are still struggling with the first question. In any case, the main point that was gathered from this observation was that discipline is a must in the classroom and if the teacher is unable to discipline the students effectively, it will be difficult to have a 'proper lesson', not to even mention an 'effective lesson'. Nevertheless, disciplining these students seem to be the greatest challenge for every single teacher of that class as it seems that many of them love to move about, disturb their classmates and come up with 'games' to entertain themselves. Alas, the situation was much better during Maths lessons when the students were split up into 2 classes. Each teacher will then handle a class of about 20 students and learning was much much better in that situation. However, of course, the students still do talk quite a bit and disrupt lessons occasionally.

This morning, I started to interview students during their 'student-teacher interaction' time which is from 7.40am-8am, before they start their first period of lessons. This is something which the school had arranged because they felt that the teachers needed to get to know the students better and vice versa, in order to find out if they are troubled and to 'counsel' them if they always misbehave in class. Personally I think that this is really an excellent programme because from conversations with many teachers, it seems that many students
actually open up to their teachers during this session and many problems are thus discovered by the teachers, who will then try to help. I specially requested to 'interview' this particular boy this morning because I found him to be of a very interesting character. He would often play during lesson time and disturb his classmates. He would also answer back to the teacher whenever the teachers shouted at him. However, I noticed that he was actually quite good in his work and was able to finish up work given to him quite quickly. As a result of walking around the class the past 2 days, I managed to strike up some conversations with him and feel a sense of closeness with him. Found him to be an extremely likeable person with a great personality. Thus, I chose to speak to him today and got to know a lot more about him. The more I got to know about him, the more I appreciate him as a person and as a student... I hope that in the next few days, I will continue to get to know more students better during this 'interaction time'.

On another note, I finally got the chance to teach the class(half of the class to be exact, since I'm teaching Maths) today. Thanks to the past 2 days of observation, I was able to know most of the names of the students in the class so I could skip the 'introduction'. I further split them into 4 groups and told them that we would have a 'game' whereby students who answer questions correctly will earn points for their groups. However, points will be deducted if they misbehave. I then asked them what are the 'offences' that they often commit and how many points they suggest will be deducted for each offence and they were enthusiastic in suggesting the various offences and how many points they think should be deducted. Then the 'game' commenced. To my pleasant surprise, they co-operated very well and were very well-behaved... no one moved around the class and no one disrupted the lesson. I was very surprised because I recalled that even when I was teaching in primary school the last time, I never had a class that responded so well to this 'game'. I felt encouraged and
elated by this fruitful lesson I had with them and the more convinced I was that this group of students are teachable and fantastic.

After today's lesson, I know that I have made a good choice to take up the scholarship and I start to silently hope to be back in this school 2 years later...

Last Few Gatherings

2006-07-08T07:44:00.000-07:00

Been 'neglecting' my friends the past few weeks due to my hectic schedule. Finally had the chance to meet up again witH FY and ZW today after training. Rushed off right after keeping the tables to avoid being late. For I don't wish to be like someONE who is often either very late without notice or simply 'puts aeroplane'. It is sometimes disappointing to see how some friends change over time. And to think that that someONE could actually just not turn up for another friend's birthday celebration even after he had agreed to turn up. Refused to answer calls and SMSes and finally decided to give a call to the birthday person to say that he won't be coming only 2 hours after the supposed meeting time. How 'wonderful'! I'm sorry to say I am utterly disgusted by such behaviour. I repeat... DISGUSTED is the word. When such things happen once, we can understand and we forget it quite soon. When it happens twice, we may still forget it soon. When it happens thrice, well, we may still just try to be understanding. BUT when it happens AGAIN AND AGAIN, I'm sorry to say that such behaviour speaks for itself and I'm afraid trying to justify it is simply difficult. Convincing us that you too feel bad is even more ridiculous for your actions don't reflect what you speak.

Anyway, I hope that posting this here would serve as a reminder to all as well as to myself that we all ought to have some basic principles and not turn out to be people who do not have 信用 (xin4 yong4). In life, I strongly believe in having 信用 otherwise others would find it extremely difficult to place trust in us. It strongly affects one's reliability and integrity as a person. Who would ever dare to entrust something important to a person who does not have 信用!?

In any case, I enjoyed the 'gathering' with FY and ZW. The cheese fondue was excellent I thought, though I think after today, the next time I will want to have any cheese will probably be at least a month later. What made this gathering more 'special' was the fact that it was probably going to be one of the last few gatherings that we will be having before both of them fly off... ZW will probably be flying off about a month from now, while FY will probably be flying off about 2 months from now. Yet another parting... one has already left, and 2 will be leaving soon. I can't help but wonder how things between the few of us(including 'Wupo') will change years later when they return...

That brings me to the topic of 'parting'. It is just so inevitable that 'parting' has to take place all the time. I believe the first time most people will experience parting is when they are in primary 6. I still remember that the last day of school was quite an emotional one for many then, though not quite for me. As we sang the graduation songs in the school hall, many students' tears just flowed... perhaps the words just struck a chord with how they felt. The completion of secondary 4 is also another moment of parting for many. People will then head towards wherever their dreams or results bring them to... but by then, most of us would already have accepted the fact that such parting is just part and parcel of life. I guess its more or less the same after the A levels and I shall not carry on otherwise I myself would feel like clicking on the 'x' at the top right hand corner of the screen.

Personally, the first two times I experienced emotional partings was when my beloved hamsters passed away about 1 year 3 months ago and 1 year 9 months ago respectively. The first one left me suddenly, without having any visible illness. She probably left very peacefully, for when I went home to 'clear' her body, she was resting in one of her favourite positions inside her favourite log. As I stretched my hand out to lift up her fluffy but stiff body, her 'sister' came running over and stared at me as if she did not want me to take the body away. When I eventually removed the body, her 'sister' ran under the 'dust'(can't remember what that thing is called) and newspapers to hide and just didn't want to see me. She looked visibly upset and so was I. I gently stroked her clean white fur repeatedly but it didn't help much in alleviating her emotional pain. Hence I left her alone for a while after that. After all, they had both been living together since they were born so I guess its natural that they grew really close despite those 'play fights' which they had quite regularly. (Look at the picture below which shows them 'quarreling'. One turned to the left, the other turned to the right).

For once I realised how emotional animals could also get. I didn't expect the 'sister' of the hammie who had passed away to react in such a manner. To the extent that I felt worried for her. I was worried that she would not be 'strong' enough to accept the death of her sister. Hence, after the death of that hammie, I would often go back home from hostel even during weekdays to spend time with her... and I'm glad I did. I enjoyed her company and I could see that she was also happy to climb onto my hand and run around on it. Maybe its just me who 自作多情(zi4 zuo4 duo1 qing2) but I really did feel that way. =P I also enjoyed the times when she would 'kiss' me. Whenever I placed her near my face, she would lick it and I would stroke her fur in appreciation. ;) Until one day (about 5 months later), when she started biting me for some reason which I did not understand. I did not sense anything amiss with her either, which made things complicated. I couldn't understand why she bit me each time she ran onto my hand. I thought that perhaps she was sick of playing with me so I tried giving her more 'peace' after that. Only after a few days/weeks later that I realised her eyes seemed a little red. I thought that perhaps she was having an eye infection so I brought her to the vet. The vet did a check on her and told me that she was having diarrhoea and it had probably been quite some time she had diarrhoea judging from the amount of weight she had lost. I felt so terrible then... for not noticing that she had lost weight and that she was having diarrhoea. Then I recalled that she started having the habit of biting me a few days/weeks ago and how she suddenly stopped biting me after I had brought her to the vet and gave her medicine. SO SMART SHE WAS! Biting me was probably her way of telling me that she wasn't feeling well, but silly me didn't understand it earlier. =( Thank goodness her diarrhoea stopped after about 2 doses of medication. The vet was actually worried that she might not make it because of her meagre weight... but I was sure relieved that she pulled through. The vet also gave medication for her eye infection which I faithfully applied for her every day. She seemed fine after that and was once again happy to play with me without biting me.

Unfortunately, several days later, her eye infection came back and this time there was pus. I saw her scratching it very often and so I brought her to the vet again. The vet decided to give her a round of antibiotics to see if it would help. Sadly after a few days, the pus still did not disappear. I had to bring her to the vet again and this time, the vet decided that there was a need to 'manually' squeeze out the pus, but it would be done with anaesthesia. I was worried sick... as I had heard of how my friend's hamster went through a successful operation but did not wake up from the anesthesia. I asked about the risks and the vet seemed confident that that should not be a problem. Thus I signed the papers to 'permit' her to undergo those procedures and before sending her to the 'operating theatre', I took her out and played with her for a short while, kissed and stroked her, before handing her over to the vet while telling her 'Please be careful and gentle with her.' (So long-winded hor?) After that, I was to leave the veterinary clinic and they said they would contact me once my dearie woke up from the anaesthesia and after sufficient 'observation'.

I waited impatiently for that call. I started calling after 2 hours and was told that she was still sleeping. It got me worried. After another half an hour or so, I called again and this time, I was told that she had woken up from the anaesthesia. I heaved a sigh of relief! However, they said that they would have to observe her for a while more. A few hours later, they called me to tell me that I could go and take her home. Whew! I was overjoyed to see her again. However, she still looked tired and weak... and it certainly pained me to see her in that state. I brought her home and let her have some rest and she seemed better a few hours later. I checked on her quite often to ensure that she was fine...

The next morning, I woke up early to find her lying motionless. I was shocked and lost. I wrapped her body nicely with cloth and tissue, placed it in a box, and brought her to be cremated at the vet's place. Before I took the box out of the car, I opened it and looked at her body one last time while thinking of all the great times I shared with her.

The vet's assistant was shocked to see her body as she still saw her alive just the day before. She gasped and I managed a helpless weak smile while fighting back tears. After filling in all the forms for her cremation, I went back to the car, lay back, and teared. I kinda blamed myself for allowing her to undergo the 'supposedly simple procedure' but I knew there was no better choice. If I had let her eye infection carry on, no one knew what could have happened... but still, I was overwhelmed by guilt and sadness, realising how much she had to undergo before leaving this world.

Perhaps it 'helped' that my exams were nearing... I was 'forced' to concentrate on my studies and try not to think about the whole episode.

Wow. An entry on 'last few gatherings' could remind me also of my 'last few gatherings' with my darlings. Unbelievable. I guess I still miss dearly those moments I spent with those 2 cuties but I wouldn't want to keep any more hamsters until at least a few years later when I have graduated and perhaps can afford more time to play with them. Alas, I ought to thank the 2 of them for making me a 'better driver'. If not for the number of times I had to drive them to the vet, I would probably not be so 'gentle' with my brakings. It was almost entirely because of them that I learnt to be gentle when braking and not drive in a manner that would scare them.

On another note, my brother can get quite irritating at times. I reached home at about 6 after training and was already in a hurry. Yet he refused to open the door for me... instead, he took out his 'dirty' and silly-looking stuff toy 'Dino' and asked me to kiss it before he would open the door for me. I refused and so had to spend quite a few minutes outside waiting for Mel to be back from buying stuff. While its also my fault for not bringing the keys, I wished he could be less irritating and disturb me less. Anyone wants an 'exchange programme'? If you are one of those who think that its great to have an older brother, how about this... I would gladly 'exchange' him with your sibling for a week and let's see if you still think its great to have an older brother. =P

Lastly, today's training went on well and I felt touched and amused by the girls who suggested that I went up with them to receive their trophies on 18 July, probably because I am around their size and can easily pass off as one of them(WAIT... is that really a compliment? =P ). YR and a few others(I can't remember who exactly) also suggested that I keep one of it since there would be 'extras' but I would certainly refuse to do so as it was entirely their hard work and fighting spirit that won them the trophy. Also, there are others who contributed selflessly for years, especially Shizhi who would often travel all the way down from his house in Bedok to train with them, and I think its people like him who truly deserve credit.

Have also informed those who were present today about the plans for 26 July and I guess that would again be another one of the 'last few gatherings' that I will have with many of them.

I will certainly treasure all these last few gatherings...

The End & Memories

2006-07-07T08:36:00.000-07:00

Yesterday marked the end of the Nationals for the team. The past 2 weeks have been hectic, with the past 3 days being the most hectic of all.

I'd say that every player has played her part well and has contributed to the team coming in 4th. All of them deserve a treat from me, which will take place on 26 July, Wednesday. I will give more details soon.

As for yesterday's matches, the players did well too, but not well enough to clinch the 3rd place. It was quite a waste... nevertheless, they have all done their best. Sometimes, the best just ain't good enough... but I guess its alright, so long as everyone is happy.

Personally, I made some important realisations in the course of the week. I realised that I had 'wronged' JM and S. They are not stubborn. Neither did they intend to 'defy' advice that I gave them. Its just that they tried but were not able to do it due to nervousness. For example, they may have intended to serve a short ball but it ended up being 'long' because the hand stiffened up(one's muscles tend to contract when one is nervous) during the game and lacked control. They had intended to serve to the right but somehow it still ended up on the left. All these made me discover that when it comes to table tennis, I may have the 'hardware', but I still lack the 'heartware' at times. =S Anyway, this realisation made me feel bad about having those negative thoughts the previous week but hey, I have discarded those thoughts already! Started to find S very likeable too... I like her character because it does remind me a lot of myself when I was young, like how stubborn I could be towards certain people and how I can't be bothered with what they have to tell me. Plus the kind of 'look' I'd give them when they talked to me and how I pretended to be listening when I was totally not. Hehe I'm so proud of her... she's really a reflection of myself(when I was young) in the mirror, though I was probably not as 'cute' as she is now. (At least she smiles more than I did and has 2 cute ponytails)

Maybe I should elaborate a bit more. Even though I was really terribly stubborn towards those coaches/people, they were completely helpless about it and still tried to be nice to me. Why? Because I was still able to produce exceptionally good result, hence they just had to shut their mouths and bear with my stubbornness and perhaps even rudeness because their rice bowls kinda depended on the results that I produced. When I was young, I didn't really know what was their intention of trying to 'teach' me (the wrong things) but as I grew older, I realised that it was because they wanted to 'claim credit' for my achievements and they had falsely believed what they have taught to be correct and the best. Oh well... too bad for them. Everyone knew and still knows who was responsible for my decent achievements and in my heart, I am still extremely grateful to them. They had the right attitude towards 'educating' me... especially a coach with the initials LSH. He totally couldn't be bothered about 'claiming credit' for my achievements even though he was really totally responsible for all my major achievements. All he really bothered about was that I improved under him and that he passed his skills, techniques and knowledge down to me. He would patiently explain to me all the theories behind this and that technique and why it should be done in the particular way, what are the advantages and disadvantages of doing it this way, etc. Very comprehensive and logical, such that till date i still remember most of what he had told me then. All that helped me to appreciate table tennis much much better on a micro level rather than on a macro level. It is towards coaches like him that I have utmost respect for. I remember him being the first person I would call after every important match to tell him how I fared(luckily my parents didn't know that else they would probably be jealous). I realise I have digressed a lot... once I start talking about my beloved coach LSH, I would just go on and on... simply because he has a special place in my heart even till date.

I am suddenly also reminded by what was mentioned by a principal at the sharing session at MOE yesterday and how it struck a chord with me. "Most students only remember 2 kinds of teachers - the very good, and the very bad." I would say the same goes for coaches. I remember fondly my 'good coaches' like LSH who really did me good and helped me improve, as well as the lousy coaches who taught me all the 'wrong things' that caused me to waste time trying to correct them later on. And wait... one more category of coaches that I remember - the clowns. =P Anyway, that sentence which the principal said made me ask myself once again, what kind of teacher would I want to be, and what kind of coach would I want to be? Do I want to become a 'I believe I know everything and I know best' kind of teacher? Or do I want to be a realistic and down to earth teacher who learns together with the students? When it comes to things that I myself am not proficient at, do I falsely believe to know it best, or will I get others who are more proficient at it to guide the students? It really got me thinking...

I am amazed by how a few simple realisations made me think so much and how they raked up my memories of the past. Our mind is indeed so fascinating that I can't help but wonder how it managed to link up so many things. Or I guess I'm just tired, so off to bed I go!

A Question

2006-07-06T08:27:00.000-07:00

I asked Isen a question yesterday. 'If you feel upset or pissed off by someone's behaviour, would you tell the person straight to the face that you feel offended by his behaviour or just 'hint' by talking around the topic?'

I was truly impressed and amazed by Isen's reply. He said 'Well if its me, generally, if he/she close to me, I'll tell him/her straight. Think its worse if I beat around the bush. If not close to me, I'll just keep quiet, bear with it... but thats me lah. Oh another thing... depends on person, meaning, even if he/she is close, but I know he/she will be hurt or can't take it if I say, I'll let it be also. Similarly, if not close but I know he/she can take it, then I'll say.'

Seeing his reply immediately cooled me down. The fact that he would be more willing to 'bear with it' than to hurt the other person who pissed him off first made me feel that I ought to learn from him how to be a kinder person...

Specially For All NH TT People

2006-07-04T09:52:00.000-07:00

I have created a forum which is something like an online chit chat corner for all the NH Table Tennis people. Didn't create a blog as suggested by the person who left the comment(I don't know who but I can make a good guess) because I'm afraid many of you might feel shy to post and it will die down very quickly. You may access the forum here:

http://tabletennis.uni.cc/nhchitchat

Invite all your NH TT friends there and have fun!

A Roller Coaster Ride

2006-07-04T08:02:00.000-07:00

The 'excitement' set in today, as we played the 2 relatively weaker teams in our group which we had to beat if we wanted to get into the top 4.

We started off playing SNG. S was in good form today and overcame her opponent, the 1st singles, quite easily. For the first time I saw her perform so cool-ly! Next came our doubles against their first doubles. It was a tough fight as we made far too many mistakes. I think YL was very nervous... but its understandable because I believe that everyone of us was dying to win the matches today. Thank goodness we managed to clinch the 2nd point as well. Next we had JM to play the 2nd singles. The first set saw her being 'trashed'. However, after adjusting her playing style, she actually managed to put up an excellent fight against her steady opponent and stretched her all the way to the 5th set where she lost very marginally. What a waste! For once I saw JM play well... all along she has been just serving and smacking and losing really fast(except the first match which she won). This time round, I think it was really heartening to see that she too could be quite steady at the competition table. I am definitely not saying that cutting is the best way out at the competition table but I think that in order for one to be able to attack well while playing on the competition table, one really needs to train regularly... so I guess this playing style that she displayed today fits her better at the moment since she has very little time to train. After JM played her match, our 2nd doubles played. Even though the opponents seemed weaker than them in terms of skills, I think we were a bit too nervous and made too many mistakes, thus making the scores really close many at times. Thank goodness we clinched the winning point after 4 gruelling sets. The last match was played by WL. We had an advantage for we had already won the game against SNG. Alas, WL didn't manage to perform well and sucuumbed to her opponent quite quickly. I was quite disappointed, considering the fact that she was playing very well during the past 3 trainings. Thank goodness this disappointment didn't last...

The 2nd match of today was against NY, a school which we had never won before. Just 3 months ago we lost to them in the zones and hence we were definitely expecting a tough fight. Sure enough, it was a tough one and watching it made me feel like I was on a roller coaster ride...

We used the same line up against them. S played the first singles and it was really great to see her beat the NY first singles! She played so well and was able to attack such that the opponent wasn't able to block most of her smashes and topspins. The tactics which she used were great too. If only she had made less mistakes in her attacks, I think the score would have been less marginal... but anyway, I rejoice in the fact that S played well and won. She really deserves praise for being so cool-headed and for performing so well today against both her opponents.

Next came our first doubles playing against the opponent team's weaker pair of doubles. It wasn't entirely unexpected... for I had already thought that they might swap in order to secure 1 point from their doubles. We definitely expected to win this doubles, perhaps even with ease... but expectations aren't always met, sadly. We won the first 2 sets, then went on to lose the next 2 sets. In the last set, we were leading 9-6... then came this ball that flew off the table. I saw it fly off. The girls saw it fly off. The umpire saw it fly off. Thus he flipped the score and it read 10-6. Strangely, the opponent team's teacher in charge stood up and claimed that the ball hit the edge of the table. Their players also claimed that it hit the edge of the table. Then the umpire awarded them the point. Baffling it was. Alas, things happened very quickly... even before I(or anyone else) could react, the game resumed and guess what? We lost 4 points in a row to lose 11-9. Everything just happened too fast for me to believe what really happened then... after I realised what had happened, I felt really disappointed for I strongly believed that this point was one of the 'must-get' points if we wanted to win the match against NY. I could feel myself lose 'enthusiasm' after this match...

JM went on to play the 2nd singles, against one of the 'NY's sisters'. Once again she did well, but not well enough to win, unfortunately... Alas I gotta admit that it was a good attempt and I ought to give her credit for putting up such a good fight. She was really in quite a good form today and it was just a waste that she didn't manage to win any of her 2 opponents.

Now we were down 1-2. YR and J went up to play against NY's stronger pair of doubles. Could see that they, especially YR, were still really pissed off with NY for claiming that the ball hit the edge of the table in the previous doubles match. Could see her 'burning hot inside' when she played. The first set saw them losing marginally, due to excessive mistakes in attacking(made mainly by YR). Think the 'fire' got her somewhat too impatient. Coaxed her to cool down after the 1st set and tried coaxing her to be less aggressive... it proved to be slightly better, as they went on to win the 2nd set. The 3rd set saw them trailing 1-5 from the start. Alas, don't know what happened to J, she suddenly started smashing and all the balls went in! Surprise surprise... they managed to catch up and ended up winning the set quite easily after catching up. The 4th set saw them doing well too as their opponents started making many 'careless mistakes'. We thus won the match and the big score now read 2-2. Kudos to YR and J for fighting their hearts out against the better pair of NY's doubles... They sure do deserve praise.

The deciding match was then played by WL, against the other sister. The opponent sure was an aggressive and good player... as we had all seen during the zone competition. Alas, WL started off extremely well and managed a 8-0 lead before winning the first set 11-7(somewhere around there I think). The 2nd set saw the opponent attacking fiercely and more accurately and I could see that WL was quite 'shocked' by the accurate and fierce shots coming over to her. Yet she still put on a good fight but lost this set. The 3rd set soon started and WL again fought hard to keep up with her opponent. With her variations in service and steady 'cutting' with her anti-spin, she managed to get her opponent to 'commit suicide' in attacking and won this set very comfortably and if I don't remember wrongly, the score was something like 11-2! Amazing it was! Unfortunately, the opponent made less mistakes in the subsequent set and won it back, forcing the game into its last set. Could see that the NY girl wanted to win really badly as she probably felt that she 'ought to' win the match. This urge to win probably translated into nervousness for her, as she went on to make more mistakes in the last set, with WL winning it 11-7(if I don't remember wrongly). PHEW... We all were overjoyed! WL sure deserves the most praise for being such a great fighter against a well-skilled opponent. Could tell that she was also 'heated up' during the match as she did several 'funny things', like shouting out loud to herself 'STEADY', and at one point of time, when Thomas shouted 'relax' to her, she actually responded by shouting out the word 'RELAX' as well. Almost fell off my chair laughing despite the tense atmosphere. But all these just show how much she wanted to win and this I certainly applaud!

Left CF Pri feeling indescribably elated after that. I don't even remember feeling this happy when I won a SEA Games gold medal 7 years ago. I was simply glad that they have successfully gotten into the top 4 of the National Schools Championship and will be receiving the coveted medal, even though we do not know what the colour of the medal will be yet. This medal is a precious one... one which they had fought hard for with lots of sweat and perhaps even some tears. It is certainly a good 'souvenir' for the primary sixers and a source of encouragement to the younger ones to keep up the good work.

3 cheers to them~! Hope that they will continue to fight hard in the coming matches and earn themselves a medal of a 'nicer colour'.

Getting Squeezed Out Of A Seat

2006-07-01T07:15:00.000-07:00

Something happened yesterday while I was on board the NEL on the way to harbourfront to celebrate a friend's birthday. Thought of sharing it because I think it is quite 'educational' and one would probably learn something out of it after reading about what transpired.

As usual, the NEL wasn't too packed and I got a seat the moment I boarded the train. I don't normally sit down on trains because many at times, just a short while after sitting, I would need to give up my seat to some elderly person or some pregnant lady. Remember thats what we learnt in 好公民 in primary school? If you have forgotten, please flip through your 好公民 textbook now! Alright thats besides the point for now. What happened was my butt whispered to me that it was aching after the training with the NH students so it wanted a rest. I decided to be kind to it for once and allowed it to have the empty seat that was frantically waving to it and saying 'sit on me sit on me'. So my dear butt had a good 10 min rest until the train reached Dhoby Ghaut...

The person seated on my left alighted from the train. So did the one on my right. Thus there were 2 empty seats beside me. I then saw 2 ladies who were friends walking towards the seats beside me. I decided to move over to the seat on the right so as to enable them to sit together rather than with me sitting in between them. Unknown to me, they had a 3rd friend. I must say those 2 ladies did not forget their 3rd friend... they 'moved in' a little to give the 3rd friend some space to squeeze in(yes 3 grown up ladies trying to squeeze into 2 seats on the train...) and guess what? I was therefore squeezed out of my seat... Ended up standing for the rest of the journey and amused by what had happened.

You may wish to try that the next time you take the MRT with your friends. At your own risk! =P

A Reasonably Good Start

2006-06-27T10:33:00.000-07:00

So it kicked off today, with the first match against EP being crucial in getting us into the next round. Thank goodness JM managed to win the first point, YL and K clinched the 2nd point, and S the 3rd. Unfortunately, YR and J lost the 4th match, and WL didn't perform well in the 5th match as she was having some problems adjusting her backhand cut in that match. All the matches against EP were really close and are just not meant for the weak-hearted. I realised how nervous I could get watching them play, most probably something like 10 times more nervous than when I myself am playing. The umpire, a friend of mine, actually came over to tell me nicely to not give instructions when the players are playing(for fairness sake) and yes, I gotta admit that I couldn't quite control myself. =P Also, looking back at today, I realised that my tone of voice when I talked to the players after each set was perhaps a little harsh(or at least I think so when I look back now...). Think I should try to be more conscious of that for I don't want to 'scare' them with the wrong tone of voice. =S

What next after the win against EP? Fear set in. Fear that EP might win Pei Chun and result in a tie among 3 schools. Then it would be terribly hard to predict which 2 schools would get into the next round and who knows we might just get kicked out. With such fear came anxiety and the desperate desire to win this game against PCPS.

Again, JM played the first match. This time round, she faced a rather tough opponent and the gap between their standards was quite obvious. The worst thing was, her playing style kinda pissed me off. Even asking her to just cut and forget about attacking(she only managed to get about 20% or less balls that she attacked in) was difficult. Add up the scores she managed to win in the 3 sets, they totalled less than 11. It was a real disappointment. Plus her stubbornness... sometimes it really pisses me off. My philosophy is this: If you are GOOD ENOUGH(i.e. consistently getting into the top 4 in national age group tournaments), you can afford to be stubborn. Otherwise, FORGET IT... Anyway, I think my attitude during this match wasn't good. I think I ought to reflect as well. In short, I simply wasn't so interested in that match for a variety of reasons. Maybe I'm just a little biased and practise a bit of 'favouritism' not-so-consciously.(Sometimes just can't help it right...?)

The 2nd match was played by K and YL. It wasn't as tough a fight as the previous match against EP though it still did make me sweat a little. We thus won this match and I am quite happy with the performance of K and YL. On the whole, both of them did well today, being able to withstand the immense pressures being put on them and yet being able to deliver the wins. No doubt they needed constant reminding and pushing to carry out their respective 'roles' but still, they ought to be applauded for being great fighters today. Also glad that YL played without showing any signs of being sick even though she was still sick. That's the kind of attitude of a good sportsperson and I'm extremely glad that she has displayed that. As for K, it was probably a 'breakthrough' for her as she attacked well today even at the most crucial points and I'm certainly glad she did. I hope that those great shots boosted her confidence in her attacking skills.

The 3rd match was played by S. She didn't perform so well and after 5 gruelling sets(if I didn't remember wrongly), she was pinned down by her opponent. Her stubbornness did piss me off too. I'm sure she would have done better if she had varied her services and had given her opponent more short serves to the right rather than to the left. But since she chose to ignore the advice, well, what could I do except to just sit(to be exact, stand) there and watch her get 'slaughtered'... Again, my attitude here wasn't exactly good but I think there's nothing much that can be done to one who isn't very receptive to advice? =S

The 4th match was quite a breeze for YR and J. I'm glad that J did not make as many mistakes with her forehand cuts in this match as compared to the previous match against EP. As for YR, she made quite a number of mistakes in her forehand smashes but on the whole she still performed quite up to standard I thought. Kudos to the both of them for being able to withstand the pressure of being down 2-1 and winning this match. I'm also glad that the both of them seem to be able to get along fine and I hope that my short talk with them yesterday about the importance of being encouraging and understanding towards each other when playing doubles helped. (seems like playing doubles and being in a relationship has many similarities. =P)

The 5th match was the determining factor for this game against PCPS. While the 2nd doubles of YR and J were playing, I decided to train a little with WL. Not that such last minute training would really help improve her playing, but I thought it might help to boost her morale and make her feel more prepared and calm. Thank goodness she played well in this match and was able to keep her cool despite having played not-so-well in the previous match against EP. She won the first 2 sets quite easily but got 'stuck' in the 3rd set, even trailing 9-10. But she fought on and won back that set. WL sure deserves a big pat on her back for that(a gentle one... not the YR type of pat =P).

Oh and something which I missed out... in the midst of the game against PCPS, the umpire(a different one this time) came over (again) and asked me to =x. Looks like its really not easy for me to control my mouth when I'm watching them play... *grin*

To conclude the day's performance, I think that each and everyone of the players have played a significant role in winning their matches against EP and PC. YL and K deserve the most praise for winning BOTH their crucial matches and the others all deserve some praise for winning in either match. Hence, we have now safely gotten into the top 8 of the nationals. Cheers. Hope that we will all proceed further into the top 4. Will give the girls a treat if they achieve that target... (so start drooling now~!)

After the matches ended, it was already about 5.45pm and I went on to have a fantastic evening. 27 June 2006 was a great day for me and I hope it was also a great day for you.

May the NH TT girls keep up their winning streak!

IT Starts Tomorrow!

2006-06-26T06:32:00.000-07:00

Finally, the 'long-awaited' nationals is here. It kicks off tomorrow, with the girls' team having to play 2 important matches. Trained with them today and on the whole I think they are doing fine. I do not know what happened, but today YR won K 3-1 and YL won JM 3-0(if I didn't remember wrongly). On one hand I am glad that YR and YL have improved(I believe they have...) to be able to beat their 'seniors'. On the other hand, I can't help but worry that our 'supposedly better' players are not in tip-top condition.

In any case, I think I should just look forward to the matches and not worry unnecessarily. Also, I hope that YL recovers soon. She fell sick yesterday but yet still came for training today. I asked her to have more rest and play less but she herself wanted to practise her doubles. Was certainly glad to see that.

Looking forward to watching them play tomorrow, though I haven't quite figured out which roads I should take to get to the venue(CF Pri).

On another note, While training with S, K, JM, WL, and J today, I couldn't help but realise that its probably one of the last few times I'll be training with them. Very soon(depending on whether or not they get into the next round), it will be time for them to hang up their bats and concentrate on preparing for their PSLE. After that, it would be time for them to move on to the next phase of their lives in secondary schools. I hope that they will all make it into their dream secondary schools and if they were to continue playing table tennis, I hope that they will continue to improve and do their new school proud. Most importantly, I hope that they have had no regrets joining the NH table tennis team and have enjoyed the game thus far despite my trainings being kinda strict and boring. =P

Before I head to bed, here's wishing the players all the best for tomorrow!

My 'Childhood BF'

2006-06-21T07:05:00.000-07:00

Throughout my years of playing table tennis, I got to know many people and I guess I would like to write an entry about a particular childhood table tennis friend of mine. I must say that even though I've made many 'friends' through table tennis, sadly, not all of them were nice to me. I've been hurt by many along the way... but thats besides the point for now as I have more exciting stuff to rant about. =P

Met up with my 'childhood bf' for dinner yesterday evening. Its been a few months since I last met him, with it taking place in the hospital. His lungs had collapsed then. It was really heart wrenching to see him lying on the hospital bed. So glad that the whole ordeal is more or less over for him already and that he will soon be leaving for the United States for his University education.

Well, why was he considered my 'childhood bf'? Just like those kids, I too had my fair share of *that kinda fun* years ago... which obviously isn't THAT long ago(Remember... I'm young~ =P). It all started when we were in sec 2(but we had already gotten to know each other since primary 3). We went on a 17-day training cum competition trip to Bangkok together and started to get teased about being together in the midst of the trip. How long did that teasing last? *counts* Not 1 year, not 2 years, but 3 years(or even more)!

Wouldn't go into too much detail about the teasings as they no longer matter to us now. Shall also omit the details about what were the things we did then and what exactly happened. Otherwise this entry would become too boring and even typing it would make me want to click on the 'x' at the top right hand corner of my screen. Will only mention the stuff that are most worth mentioning... which is also what we reminisced about last night over dinner.

It happened when we were in our first year of college. We were both selected to represent the country in the SEA Junior championship. We got to stay in a hotel during that period of time. One night, he came over to my room for a chat while my room mate was over at another room with the other girls who were about her age(they were 2-3 years younger than we were). After our long chat, he decided to go back to his room for a sleep, only to realise that his naughty teammates(the younger boys) had latched the door and refused to let him in because they wanted him to just stay over in my room. The next thing I knew, my room mate also told me that she wanted to sleep over at the other room that night. So... ermmm... *ARGH* But wait... she wanted to get her blanket and pillow over. So what did we do?

We already knew what they had *hoped* we were doing, so we played along. We latched the door and pretended that we were busy doing what they were thinking... then tried to sound irritated when they asked for this and that. First we passed her the pillow through the small opening between the latch and the door. Next, we squeezed the blanket through that opening. Phew... all was done. They stopped disturbing us for a while.

A few minutes later, I guess curiosity got the better of them. They called and asked us to pass them some toilet paper... so again, through that small opening, we passed the toilet paper to them. It was such a lame reason but well, we still played along.

They left us alone after that, with us wondering how we were going to spend the night. I had better stop the story here without any further elaboration, otherwise things would go out of hand. =P

Those were simply the good old days... I miss all the 'innocent fun' I had then. ;)

I treasure this innocent friendship a lot and I still keep what he gave me on my 15th birthday(how many years ago was that???) right in front of his mum! Below is a photo of it... Promise that you don't laugh. =P

So... my message to all the 'younger ones' is... treasure all the teasings that you are getting now. In the blink of an eye, all these will pass and I hope that when its time to look back, you will think back on those moments and smile to yourself just as I do now. =)

An Enjoyable Trip

2006-06-15T02:22:00.000-07:00

Just came back from the Malacca-Batu Pahat trip with the students. On the whole it was very enjoyable albeit tiring. Throughout the trip I was in a very relaxed mode, even joining in their rubbish-talking. I guess I do surprise myself sometimes. Was only less relaxed when they did dangerous things like hiding in the cupboards or walking slowly when crossing the highly disorganized roads.

Throughout the course of this trip, I got to understand each individual student better and this is something I'm really glad to have done as it had helped me to appreciate every single one of them more. Perhaps I should write a little about each person here. Will start off with the girls:

1. K - She doesn't talk and mix much with the other 'noisy' people but she is observant and seems to think quite a bit. Sometimes I don't know what she's thinking, especially when playing TT. At times I feel that she isn't feeling happy, but not exactly sure if what was troubling her is what I think. She actually broke down after a match and I can't understand why either. =S Also, her playing style has changed a lot after the training 'camp' the previous week. She has become so unbelievably aggressive, even choosing to use backhand topspin to receive service. Really surprising. With such a playing style comes greater risks of course...

2. WL - Another 'more quiet' one. 'Quiet' in the sense that she doesn't talk loudly but she definitely whispers a lot. A lot of 'gossips' that is. =P Nevertheless, she's extremely likeable as she's very well-behaved and trustable and doesn't go around 'quarrelling' with others or disturbing others. The best thing about her is that she is very filial. When we went shopping, the first people she thought of getting presents for were her parents. Her parents are really lucky to have a daughter as 乖, thoughtful and filial as her.

3. J - She's not 'loud', but not very quiet either. Another professional 'gossiper'. Often trying to put people together. On the first day I got to see how 'ji po' both she and WL were already. But of course I had my ways to prevent myself from being 'matchmade' by them. *smug look* However, she is not a very disciplined girl. She actually used the calculator while doing her Maths homework. Tsk tsk. Also, she is easily distracted by others, as can be seen when she took out her homework before her but ended up watching YR play game instead. *shake head* =P Behaviour wise, I guess I have to admit that she is quite well behaved and wouldn't anyhow go annoy others. Has a likeable personality too.

4. YR - She's 'loud', but has a softer side too. She is one who loves attention, as can be seen from how loud and often she screams. She is also very rough, often kicking or smacking Shizhi and Thomas. With the boys she is equally rough. As a result, they don't like to play with her. Alas, on the last night, some things happened and it seemed like she felt hurt/upset by it. This morning, she was so quiet... so unlike her usual self. I guess a heart is still a heart... it is susceptible to hurt. =\ Hope that she would be back to her happy chirpy self soon, minus all the kickings and smackings. As for her 'softer' side, I must say I was quite touched when she asked me when my bday was when we were shopping inside a gift shop. Although I didn't tell her(they gotta realise its not easy to dig such personal info like bday and age out from me =P), I must say that it was nice of her to have asked. As such I conclude that she is actually good-natured...

5. YL - She appears quite noisy at times but she actually has a quiet and observant side too. At times she would sit with K's mum and myself and listen to our conversations. I must say that she has good self-discipline. She would do her homework without people asking her to, even in a noisy room. She's the kind who knows that work is more important than play. No wonder she does well in her studies. She is actually not as playful as she seems, as can be seen by the way she 'controlled' herself in the arcade. Perhaps just a little careless to have lost her mum's hp. I can only hope that her mum isn't too pissed and harsh with her. =x

6. SY - She's extremely good natured, but also VERY ROUGH. I saw the way she hit the boys and I was STUNNED. Alas, she's very generous and she shares stuff with the others very willingly. She's just innocently violent. Also, she seemed to enjoy being cared for, as can be seen when she would occasionally walk beside K's mum or myself to tell us very trivial things. A very innocent young girl...

Now for the boys...

1. N Tan - This guy is extremely intelligent. Can see how he uses his intelligence in the 'wrong ways' from the way he talks. =P I'd be inclined to think that he eavesdrops his parents' conversations very often such that he can even 'memorize' a lot of stuff they say. Some things which he said really sound too mature to be from him, so its gotta be from his parents(as I strongly believe he is still an innocent little boy). However, it was really interesting to note that he is actually quite sensitive towards others' feelings(or at least he tries to) and that he is very concerned about others.

2. N Teo - This boy is full of surprises. Looks so 乖 but is actually so playful. But he's nice... he actually chipped in 10RM for a ball which he wouldn't even get to bring home. Looks quiet but once again I need to remind myself that 'looks are deceiving', evident from what I'd seen the past 4 days. Just looking at people is enough to give him something to talk about. He's another one sensitive new aged guy... After telling me that he thinks I looked like one of the M'sian girl's mother (*gasps*), he asked me if I was angry. Then he questioned me on what I would do if it was N Tan who had said that and what I would do if it was him who had said that. So innocently silly. =P

3. JM - This guy is a true blue 'brother'. Can tell that he is one who 讲义气 and will not hesitate to help his 'brothers' whenever the need arises. Though he appears playful as well, I realised that he can be deep in his own thoughts at times too. I sense that he is a very resilient boy. Also ought to mention that he seems like the kind who likes to do things his own way, as can be seen from his very unique (table tennis) playing style.

4. E - He's the youngest to have gone for the trip. He has a very pleasant personality and really took good care of his 'brother' JM when the latter fell sick on the 2nd day. Seeing him play table tennis makes me laugh, as he keep falling onto the floor. I think he is the most well-behaved among the boys. He asks for permission for almost everything that he wants to do. Still not very mature in thoughts but one can see that he is inherently kind hearted. He's just a little clumsy sometimes but I feel thats what makes him so cute and adorable.

On the whole, watching the way the boys played, talked and behaved kept me entertained. I can never forget how 2 of them were holding on to ONE bowl of soup on a tray. Each person held one side of the tray and they were walking like crabs in the food court. Almost laughed my heads off. On the other hand, they have impressed me with their strong bonding. They are so close to each other and united in almost everything that they do. I heard about the 'pillow fight' they had with the girls, or rather, how they were hit by the girls with the pillows and how they blocked one another from being hit. It must have been a very cute sight!

Also, have to say that I had a nice time being in the same room as K's mum. We chatted till late on the 2nd and 3rd nights and we talked about everything under the sun. Its amazing, considering our age difference. Perhaps she's young at heart(simply because I refuse to think that I'm old at heart which isn't even true anyway =P )...

Just felt a little bad about something I did during the trip though. I told a white lie(which I very seldom do) but I shall not reveal what it is. It was after weighing the pros and cons that I decided it was better to tell a white lie. Otherwise may get someone else into 'trouble'. Managed to fool the silly kids with ease so kudos to me. I have also deliberately put this paragraph at the back of the entry so that any of them reading this more-than-2000-word entry would miss this portion as most people would already have clicked on the 'x' at the top right hand corner of the screen after reading a paragraph or two. =D

Watching all of them have fun and squabbles the past 4 days really reminded me of those days when I went on overseas trips with my teammates. I was probably just as mischievous, especially with my sharp tongue and naughty ideas, but thank goodness I wasn't violent like them. We would play 'blind cat' in the hotel room on the last night after all the competitions have ended and we would have fun disturbing the 'blind cat' by 'hitting' him with our pillows.

At times, we would disturb the coaches by putting a bag of rubbish just outside their room doors and also putting another bag outside our own room door so it would seem like we were also 'victims' of mischief. Once, one of us(NOT ME) even took away one of the coaches' shoes that was being placed at the door to prevent it from slamming shut and had it placed outside another coach's room with the hope that the coach who 'lost' a shoe would think that the other coach had taken his shoe for fun.

Once, we even threw banana skin into the the team managers' bathroom through the open windows because we found 1 of them really irritating.

Well, thank goodness these kids didn't think of all these things. Looks like it isn't time for my 'retribution' yet. =P

After talking so much about the kids, I guess I ought to write down some things which I had learnt too. In terms of culture, even though almost everyone whom we had met at the table tennis friendly matches were Chinese, we all held different beliefs. As a local Chinese, I do not pay much attention to all the small little things like asking parents to eat first during meal times, etc. During my casual conversation with my friend's mum(who is the coach at Malacca), she mentioned that she taught all her players that and made sure that they did that at home. Such practice was probably common here decades ago, but was most likely abandoned by many after being a little more influenced by the western culture. My personal opinion is that after all, 'we' are one family... so why stand on ceremony? But I guess they are still pretty much influenced by the Chinese school of thoughts and thus still value and see the importance of these practices.

Knowing that my friend's parents are people who value these practices, I had not much of a choice but to be especially courteous to them during the dinner which they treated us to, in return for their kind hospitality. After all, I was still a kid when I first got to know them so I guess its also natural for me to show them due respect even till now. Nevertheless, I still think that I wouldn't really care about these practices now that I'm back in my own country. Ironically, I too find it quite 'fake' for myself to be doing these kinda things... =P

All good things have to come to an end, just as this trip had. Its now time to be back in the more serious mood and prepare them for the upcoming nationals which I really hope they would do well in.

Looking Forward & Back

2006-06-10T19:24:00.000-07:00

Leaving with the team tomorrow for Malacca/Batu Pahat for a table tennis trip cum holiday(I think). Looking forward to the trip because I think it will be a good time to see them bond together, especially so for the girls. For the boys, sadly, only a few of them are going. I am sure the girls who are going will enjoy it thoroughly, especially for those who really 'fought hard' to get permission from their parents to go for it. Also, I think that it would be a very good learning experience for them because they will be playing with good players over there and hopefully they can learn something from their M'sian counterparts. On the other hand, amidst all the fun, I do hope that they will have some discipline... don't want them to tarnish their school's reputation.

Talking about discipline, I am reminded of the past 2 training sessions which I had with them. 2 young and new players P and FY were there as well. I had taught both of them the proper technique for forehand, and though with me they each had managed to play at least a ball whereby there were at least 30 returns of forehand, their strokes were still not always correct and they had to be constantly reminded in order to get it correct. Hence, when I had to train the senior girls, I left them alone to train and told them to just practise the service and 1 return, then forget about the ball. Several times, I caught them continuing to hit the ball with their forehand totally messed up... so I gently reminded them for the first time to stop after 1 return. I also explained that it is because I do not want them to spoil their forehand stroke which I had taken quite a bit of time to get it there. Alas, they refused to follow instructions and once again, I reminded them, this time not so gently. They STILL refused to follow instructions. Alright... I deemed it was time for me to be harsh. I told them very sternly that if they were to continue to not follow instructions and in doing so 'spoil' their forehand stroke, then I would not be interested to train with them either. This time round, they decided to be good and follow the instruction.

The parents who were there were actually quite surprised that I was so stern with them and they even thought I was really angry. But no. I am not angry. I just want them to know 1. the basic strokes are very important and all the other things aren't important if they cannot get their basics right first 2. joining the team means they should be following instructions from the teachers in charge and coaches and not blatantly ignoring them and simply go ahead and do what they want 3. They are only pri 3 and pri 4 respectively and they DARED to defy instructions. If I do not give them the impression that discipline is a MUST in the team now, when shall I do it?

The following training, I was training with P. I wanted her to practise her footwork because she tends to 'fall' to the right when the ball is nearer to her right. Hence I asked her to work on her footwork. Just wanted her to get her legs there and posture right but not to hit the ball, as the problem with her was that her hand was always there before her body even got there, and she only moved her legs AFTER she had hit the ball, which obviously wouldn't work! Hence I told her NOT to hit the ball first, but just to get her legs there and posture correct. I stressed 'not to hit the ball'. Alas, she still hit it. I reminded her again 'DON'T hit the ball' and explained to her why I wanted her to do it that way. But she hit it again. Finally when it happened again for the 3rd time, I asked FY to train with me and told P straight in the face that I do not want to train with her if she is not going to obey instructions. She appeared quite upset and seemed to be fighting back tears(I am terribly experienced at knowing when people are fighting back tears =P ). After training for FY for a while, then I gave P another chance. I told her I would give her another chance to do the same thing again. She did NOT obey yet again. Fine. I walked over to the other table with the balls and just started training with the senior girls(they just arrived then) with a look to show her that I was displeased with her.

Now, this is really disturbing. A pri 4 who repeatedly refuses to follow instructions... did she not understand what I was trying to say? I do not think so. I speak slower when I speak to them and she DOES understand Chinese(and I spoke in English too). So is there a reason for her to not have understood?

I really dislike being so harsh with kids... but for their good I do it occassionally, in order to send the right message across. I do not yell at them either. I just give them the 'cold treatment'. I just hope that I don't have to do it again... ...

Encouraged and Slightly Relieved

2006-05-21T08:04:00.000-07:00

Unhappiness doesn't last, thankfully. Feel very encouraged by how the parents have been treating me.

Went to watch the kids play in the competition organized by Unity sec the day before yesterday and they did perform more or less up to expectations, though some matches that could have been won were lost. I guess I couldn't expect much since they haven't been training much, with their exams just over. These kids really amaze me... almost all of them are able to juggle studies and table tennis very well.

It was actually quite a last minute decision to go watch them play. I woke up only at 12 noon as the medicine which I have been taking make me terribly drowsy and sleepy. Then I received Thomas' SMS informing me about the competition so I decided to go down, since I didn't really have much to do. Took a cab down after lunch and reached there when they were playing their 2nd match. Basically just watched them play, gave some advice, as well as chatted with the parents. The parents were kinda teasing me that they hope I can quit my studies and coach their kids full time. Must say that I felt really flattered to hear that. It's actually nothing, considering how people often talk when they casual chat... but its all these little encouragements that keep my spirits high.

After the kids finished their competition, there was still some time so they continued playing among themselves there and I played with them too. I still feel that I have to agree with Thomas that in general, they players are still not suitable for very aggressive play. Forcing them to be aggressive will only result in many many unforseen errors. Thus, I guess my desired direction would still be to improve on their 'own style' of play rather than force all of them to be aggressive. I will continue to teach them some new techniques along the way to receive certain services in particular and hopefully they are able to master a few decent methods before the nationals...

Finally got the 'guts' to have a very small discussion about my 'dilemmas'... or rather, me telling Thomas about my desired 'option', and he seemed agreeable to it though I can't be absolutely sure about that. Alas, I'm really glad he didn't ask me to elaborate on IT and I appreciated that a lot. I wouldn't know how to go about elaborating if he had really asked me to elaborate. After all, some things just wouldn't sound very pleasant if one were to be too detailed.

At least I've gotten some stuff off my chest... =]

On another note, my tuition student also was another source of encouragement to me. The moment she reached home from school after getting her mid year exam results, she called me straightaway(even before calling her parents) to tell me about her results. She also shared that she was very happy because it was the first time she got such marks(in the positive sense)... she passed her English with reasonably good marks, and missed passing her Maths by just 2 marks. Nevertheless, she really deserved some praise... considering that she only scored 10 marks or so last year for Maths and didn't pass her English as well. Then she told me 'If you had taught me when I was younger, I would not have gone to EM3...' Felt touched to hear that from her, though I can't deny that I really felt sad to hear that too. She makes me feel really appreciated and I certainly appreciate that.

All these small little things have made me much happier the past few days. Thank goodness there's all these happier stuff to neutralize the unhappy stuff... ;-)

Sick

2006-05-16T02:11:00.000-07:00

Sick of everything at the moment. Gave the issue some thought and it seems like it can be quite tricky. Someone may get offended in the process. Don't know what is the best way to tackle it. Just wish I could escape from all these. At times I feel like quitting but of course many factors are holding me back, mainly the strong support and encouragement that I have been receiving all these while. Most importantly, the bonds that have been forged...

It becomes a problem for me when others interfere too much into what I do(this is certainly also true in general). This is further worsened when the other party is very defensive of every idea he or she has and when I really can't agree with the idea. Because I don't wish to offend others, I often just keep quiet after he or she has done all the 'defense' and when I see that there is really no room for further discussion. In a nutshell, he/she is the king and you are just supposed to follow the instructions that have been given. But it becomes a moral dilemma for me... for I had already discussed with the relevant in-charge to ensure that our 'ideals' are in line. Then there is a direction to work towards and it is clearer what I should do and what I shouldn't.

Alas, some people just love to act like the boss, without consulting others. All they do is to tell you what to do, and gets defensive once you try to initiate a discussion. What is the point then? If the ideas are somewhat contradictory of the intended 'direction', then how am I supposed to follow it? Of course everyone has his or her own merits which others may lack. Definitely I need to admit that I do not have all the ideas in the world and others' ideas do come in useful and I do consider each of them seriously and some of them I actually do agree completely too. However, I would really appreciate if others could also just give me the room and freedom to implement my own ideas. How would you feel if others do not give you the opportunity to carry out what you wish to do and instead tells you precisely to do this and that? The word is RESPECT. Give others due respect... No matter what we do in life, I see it a NEED to give others respect and trust that others know how to do their jobs well. There is really no need to try to make everything go YOUR way. It is like doing a project... there needs to be a lot of mutual respect among the team members, otherwise things will just go awful.

Sometimes, others' communication styles baffle me too. I recalled wondering why that person was giving me his/her ideas on who should be the main players when actually the decision is and will not made by me. All I did was to let him/her know the in-charge's ideas... but once again, he/she kinda 'insisted' on his/her own ideas. Then tell me for what? Why don't tell the 'right' person straight?

I really never expected so much **** to arise... All I had expected was to do my job well and go home happy. Nevertheless, it is just so right to say that with expectations come disappointment.

Often, it is sad to discover that friends you have 'known' for a long time actually show a different side only years later, for reasons you simply can't comprehend. I just wish I'm wrong.

Saddened

2006-05-14T02:50:00.000-07:00

Deeply saddened by something, but I guess the lack of privacy of such a public blog prevents me from saying what I wish to say. Decided to delete the post which I had just posted because I do not wish to be guilty of being 'unprofessional'. Ended up 'transfering' the post over to my more 'private' blog which is only accessible by close friends.

All that is left to say is that I am really upset by some things which 'people' do, whether consciously or subconsciously. Each time something like that happens, it is a big blow to my confidence...

Last Day

2006-04-10T08:38:00.000-07:00

Today is the last day of the girls' competition. They played 2 matches, 1 against Jurong, and the other against Nanyang.

After my lesson at 2+, I took a cab down to watch them play. When I reached there, they had just won Jurong and were playing the 4th and the 5th matches. I was then told that my 2nd singles was sick and wasn't there. Was really SHOCKED to hear that... because that meant that we would be 'giving up' a point.

Upon cooling down, I decided that there is really nothing that can be done. Player is sick and does need a rest. We just had to make do with what we had, which was still a decently strong team. All we needed were 2 points from the doubles and 1 from the singles, which was highly realistic.

UNFORTUNATELY, our first doubles lost a match which 'should have' been won. They must have been overcome by their nerves, for it is true that the pressure was on them to 'deliver'. Alas, I was disappointed not so much by the loss, but by one of the players who continued to attack despite repeatedly reminding her not to attack and just get the ball over as her attacks were just not getting in today. Also, what a last way to end the last ball(it was deuce)... that player attacked and the ball got out. Really didn't know what to say but well, I didn't scold her as it is just not me to flare up at others. After all she must have been feeling bad too.

In any case, it was just unfortunate... during that very crucial match, the opponents won 2 very crucial points 'by luck'(which most people would agree), as they 'cha1 bian1'(ball hit the edge of the table)... its obviously the worst time for this kind of balls to occur at crucial times as such. Considering such good luck that the opponent had... I guess there is just nothing we can do but to just say that they are the luckier and perhaps the better 'performers' of the day.

After that our 2nd singles seemed to be not in the right mood for the game. She played the first set pretty well and won it, but lost the next 3 and hence lost the game. I guess she had lost the motivation to do well as it was already quite clear that our chances of winning NY was slim. Nevertheless she had already tried her best I believe. It wasn't as if she anyhow played her game. Could also see that she was nervous, from the way she received the opponent's services. I often let her practise receiving similar services during trainings, but her timing was just slower today, which is something that often happens during competitions. The reason being when a person is nervous, her muscles tend to contract and get stiffer. Therefore, reaction will be delayed and once the reaction is delayed and the legs fail to step forward to receive the ball, the timing of receiving the ball will be wrong(too slow) and the ball has a tendency to be high and slow... Oh well...

Then our 2nd doubles played and finally won a point. They played rather well in the first 2 sets and their opponents were just not used to their balls hence they won those 2 sets quite easily. However, in the 3rd set, the opponents started to get used to their playing style and they got more aggressive. They managed to get quite a few good balls over and hence we lost the 3rd set. Our players then changed their 'style' in the 4th set, making adjustments to the way they hit the balls over, and YL also started to attack a little which proved to be quite effective. We then won that set and the game.

Our last singles then went up and lost to the opponent. She tried her best to win some points and that I applaud but ultimately the opponent was better.

That sums up the west zone competition for the NH team. Though it was disappointing that they could only manage a 3rd, I think it was heartening to find out that their standard was very close to the standard of the champion team and the team that came in 2nd. We could have won both of the teams on another day. Alas, it would take a lot more effort should we want to have a similar standard next year, for 6 out of 8 of our current team's players would be graduating this year, leaving only YL and YR in next year's team. Oh well...... the future is just uncertain. I don't even know if I will continue to coach them next year due to my Exchange Programme... *sigh* I just hope that if I do get the chance to prepare them for next year, I will be able to train up a few young players from scratch... which will definitely need lots of time.

Been sneezing quite badly ever since I came back from the competition venue. Hope I haven't passed the flu to anyone in the team... =X

Disappointment

2006-03-24T06:19:00.000-08:00

Haven't updated for a long time because uni had resumed and the workload is driving me crazy. Taking 6 modules again this semester, which is quite suicidal. Together with my thrice-a-week tutoring and once-a-week coaching, I am practically left with little time for rest and outings.

The table tennis team started their first match today, playing against a team that is supposedly one level or so weaker. I decided to dig out some time to go and watch their competition. The place was really far west, so in order not to waste precious time, I took a cab down.

Alas, upon reaching there, still had to wait for about an hour before the match started. It started about an hour after the scheduled time because the opponent team took a long time to finish their previous match, hence we had to wait.

For today's match, it seeemed like the players were not performing well. Our 2nd singles lost her match, which I felt should not have been the case should she have performed as per normal. I am fine with our players losing if they have tried their very best and had fought hard, but it seems like our players really LACK fighting spirit! Watching the opponent team's players made me get the impression that they are going all out to win. Watching my own players play makes me feel like they are lambs waiting to be eaten. Thankfully, not all my players are like that. At least I feel that WL and JM do display quite a bit of that 'fighting spirit', especially WL. I like her attitude.

I wonder why 2 of the singles players seem to portray the 'cannot be bothered' attitude. Watching them play today made me feel that perhaps I should have focused more on the other players during training. All these while I have been focusing on them because they were the supposedly 'best players' in the team and are considered the crucial players. However, they performed WAY BELOW their usual training standard. Perhaps not even half of how they normally perform when they train with me during the training sessions. I taught them new skills and how to improve their play by being steady plus a bit more aggressive, but it seems like none of the techniques were utilized at all. Mistakes were far too many; it was utterly disappointing... No wonder Thomas told me that I should not ask them to actively attack during competition. Sigh...

It made me feel like what I had been doing all these while during training - trying to improve on their attacking skills, is wrong. Perhaps I should have just concentrated on teaching them to cut...

In fact during today's competition, I got paranoid. I started thinking if I was to be blamed for encouraging the 2nd singles to attack whenever she has the chance, i.e. when the opponent's service is topspin and long. To me, it just doesn't make sense to cut those balls, especially when the opponent's attacking skills seemed good and her attacks were pretty accurate and powerful. Oh well... there is just no right or wrong. Anything that seems reasonable is good. Its just differing opinions... think I ought to have a discussion with Thomas about what we expect from the players for the subsequent matches. Hope that we can agree on something that will yield the best result.

After all, if I encouraged them to attack and they manage to perform well, it would be good. But if their attacks don't get in, I would feel like its my fault to have asked them to attack and cause them or even the school to lose. I think its quite a tricky issue here and I hope there is a good solution to it.

On an ending note, I hope that the players will play better in the coming matches and display more fighting spirit. All I hope for is that they play their best with the 'want to win' attitude.

The First Breakthrough

2006-01-09T23:09:00.000-08:00

As mentioned in the earlier post, I first started training in school. Training was only once a week. The school coach then, Mr. F, kept asking me to go to the association to train on Saturdays but I was initially not able to as I was learning Chinese calligraphy then and the time clashed with the training time at the association. Hence, training at the association was delayed till the end of 1994 during my pri 3 year-end vacation.

From then on, I started training at the association. Since it was vacation time, I went there almost everyday. Training was normally quite fun as there were many other kids like me who trained there. The age range was something like 8 to 12 years old. Also, the boys and girls trained together. The first time I went there, I was quite amazed by some of the players. Some boys were younger than me but they seemed really good. As for the girls, their basics seemed much better than me. They could easily play many rallies while I still felt like an amateur.

The training style was this - the first hour would be training the basics with a coach. A few players would be attached to a coach and we would take turns to play with the coach. After the first hour, we would have a 5-10 min break, whereby I saw many players having fun chit-chatting with each other and getting a drink. The remaining 50 min or so was spent playing 'sheng1 jiang4 ji4 fen1', i.e. matches. The winner would move to a 'higher' table while the loser would go to a 'lower' table, hence everyone would meet different opponents. Of course, everyone's hope was to be able to make it to the first table.

The girls would often start from the 'last' table. Hence, working our way up was not easy. Initially, I was often stuck at the last few tables. However, after some time, I managed to 'rise' up and got the chance to play with some of the boys.

The girls who trained there then included 2 girls who were 1 year older than me(JM and LY) and 2 who were of the same age as me(MX and SW). Those are all I remember. Initially, I was not able to beat the 2 older girls who seemed to have played for quite some time already. I had the impression that they were very good and difficult to beat.

XXX

A few months later in June 1995, a national age group tournament was held. The coach encouraged me to participate in the tournament and I did so. I had a shock during the first match - the participants all seemed bigger-sized and older than I was. I was only standing at 120+cm then. Interestingly, I managed to win a few matches and got through to the semi finals where I met this girl who was 2 years older than me. Each of us won a set and we proceeded to play the final 3rd set. I remember that I was trailing 13-17. It was my turn to serve. Thankfully, I won 5 points in a row from my service and eventually won that match and proceeded to the finals.

The final match was against a girl who was 2 heads taller than me. Her playing style was quite unique as it was something I had never seen before then. Her forehand was a normal rubber but her backhand was a long pimple rubber. As I had no prior experience of playing with a player or using that rubber, she was able to overcome me quite easily and I had to settle for second place.

After this tournament, I became excited about playing in tournaments and would not fail to register for them. More importantly, it was a great boost to my confidence as I realised that I was one of the top few players in my age group in my country. In subsequent under-12 tournaments, I set my targets high and aimed to come in top 2 places. I managed to achieve that except for one or two occasions when I underperformed or when my opponent performed well.

The first breakthrough for me indeed...

An Introduction

2005-12-09T07:40:00.000-08:00

One question that I am always asked is 'Why did you play table tennis, of all sports?' My answer is... 'My older brother started playing first. I was a "copycat" when I was young and liked to follow what my brother did, so I got influenced and started playing the sport too.'

In primary 3, we were encouraged to choose an extra-curricular activity. Without further thoughts, I put down my first choice - Table Tennis and if I did not remember, I probably left the rest of the choices blank.

I happily bought an affordable bat from a bookstore near my house. It was a short-hand bat that cost about $4. With that bat, I went for my first proper table tennis training in the school. I got to meet Mr. F, who was the coach of the school team then. I still remember how training started then. The whole team had to first run many rounds around the school hall, with the captain leading us, and the youngest(me) at the last of the 'line'. This warm-up jog was really tiring and taxing for me. My greatest fear at every training was this warm-up jog. The older boys there were in upper primary - mostly in primary 5 and 6 and to me, they were really fast joggers. I felt pressurized to keep up with their jogging. It was really a challenge...

After the jog, we would all line up at the tables, split into different groups. Each group would stand at one side of each table and each table would have a 'leader' standing right in front, just in front of a side of a table. What followed next was us doing the 'actions' for our forehand strokes. As I was a beginner, I always had to stand behind and follow whatever action the 'leader' was doing. In a way, the 'leader' was the person who guided those standing behind the correct action for the strokes.

Proper training only starts after the 'warm-up jog', which I felt was more like PT training, and the repetitive doing of the 'actions' and the footwork techniques. The first thing Mr. F did after the jog and the doing of 'action' was to make me hold my bat using the western style. That meant... It was time to get another bat!

The remaining of the session was then spent teaching me the forehand stroke and trying to get me to have good control of the ball and playing more rallies. Nothing very memorable after that except that I remember Mr. F asking 'Where is the table?' whenever I hit the ball out of the table. It was amusing yet slightly embarrassing.

That is about all for my primary school's weekly Saturday trainings.

Here are some things which I would like to reveal:

1. Since the first training session, I secretly started hoping that I would get to lead the team in doing the warm-up jog one day as I felt that the captain was really cool, to be the one determining the pace of the jog. This was then achieved about 2 years later.

2. From the first training session onwards, I held a wish that I would soon be able to be one of the 'leaders' leading a group to do the actions. If I did not remember wrongly, I achieved this goal in roughly a year later.

3. I had a strong desire to beat the best male player in the team. There were very few female players in the school team then, perhaps just one more. Hence, I decided to set a higher target for myself, which I achieved too.

Valuable lessons which I have learnt would first and foremost be that it is very important to set goals for myself and hold strongly to the belief that my goals are achievable, for it was the driving force behind my perceived mini-success in the sport. Next, I learnt that I should not be discouraged by remarks that others make. When I revealed my thoughts of hoping to be the best player in the team one day, there were people who splashed cold water on me, remarking that that was impossible. However, I believed in myself and I am glad that I did...

Why the Start?

2005-12-07T07:23:00.000-08:00

This is not the first time I have a blog. It is just that I have decided to set up a blog dedicated to writing about table tennis, a sport which I have played for perhaps more than 'half my life'.

Personally, I feel that my experience with playing table tennis has been extremely valuable. It has really helped me to grow as a person, holistically. Hence, I hope to share the experiences which I still remember(hopefully most of them, if not all) by sharing them here with anyone who is interested. Even if no one is interested, I think that writing them here would be great to remind myself of those 'glorious days' and perhaps 10, 20, 30, 40, ... years down the road I may just chance upon this blog and reminisce on those days.

Another motivation for me to write this blog is this - I have started coaching recently at a primary school and the young students really reminded me of what I went through about a decade ago, when I was around their age. Perhaps one day, some of them may just chance upon this and get to know more about the experiences of 'someone else' who travelled this path. Indeed, they are a source of motivation for the start of this blog.